Current Mood: annoyed... stoopid haze making Brunei so warm
Current Colour: red
Current Music: the sound of d computer
Current Annoyance: haze. haze. haze! I need a thunder storm!
Current Obsession: Dynomite & solitaire!

Grr... So annoyed right now. The haze is killing me. Itchy (an occassionally sore)eyes, itchy nose leading to flu, sore throat & heat! Grrr!!! plus now, I can smell my neighbour downstairs cooking roti canai. Dunno why but during non fasting month their roti canai smells so delicious that even in my sleep I can dream of it and when I wake up, I haf to raid the kitchen to make myself some! But now it seems as if the roti canai is burnt every night (well, if I'm awake during sahur time la!)

Anyway, I'm sure a couple of ppl reading this knows something abt my dad being one of those up for a 'promotion' thingy gummy. Not really a promotion la, just that my dad' 'boss' is retiring and well, the need someone to be the new 'boss'. (well, if u know abt this, u obviously what line of job my dad is in...) Dad made the annoucement this morning (Sunday) and the whole place (church) was pin drop silence. LOL... my sis & I were sniggering away. it's not that my dad got it la. We were sniggering at the whole situation thing. My sis said she could haf droped a feather and hear it touch the floor!

I guess lots of people think/ feel that we/I am disappointed. Seriously, we are more relieved than disappointed. I guess it's a huge burden off our backs now. Why? Well, for starters, we would ahve to move back to Kuching. I hate packing!! LOL. but seriously, what we were scared of was that if my dad had gotten it, the family would be uprooted AND separated (mom working here & mike completing form 5 next year) Plus, it would be an added responsibility to dad and we probably won't ever see him much. I mean, right now he's barely home sometimes coz of work, meetings, visitations etc... What more if he had gotten it?

Worse still... I probably have to continue to be a 'goody two shoes'. hahahah... well, I guess I'm pretty tame right now compared to my rebellious day. but still, those were just minuscle (spl?) things compared to what is happen round the world. I proud to say I don't do drug, drink nor smoke nor do I engage in "straineouss physical activities involving bodily fluids". If u get what I mean. In fact, i think i was pretty much a homebody/ girl next door since i moved to brunei. No sneaking out like before (i was always sneaking out to the post office to send fan mails... LOL). no playing truant or getting dimerit marks or being a pain in th ass for teachers. hahaha...

In uni I had the opportunity to do what ever I wanted, esp the last 2 years since I lived ALONE. no house mates to say anything if I did anything they disapprove. hahaha... Hey, cud haf brought a boy back/ sleep over/ whatever if I wanted but of course, the way i was brought up and by my own choice i never did that. LOL. hell, I would probably regret it til the day I die if had done so! Thank God for being so grounded. hahaha... but I guess i turn out right. mom told me before, she was worried I wont turn out right. but I know myself, my limits and what choices to make. If I had made the choice of saying yes to someone, probably I might even be married with kids today. who knows what wud happen?

It's weird, i have all sorts of friends. from the straight laced clean ones to those with a past to those who aren't so clean to suicidal ones to addicts of many sorts (sex, cigarettes, alcohol, etc) but i've pretty much remained the same. The peer pressure and temptations were always out there but yeah, never really succumb to it. Of course not only cos of my upbringing, i have really good friends who really cared and they prevented me from doing anything stupid that i might regret. Hey, I almost started smoking coz of stupid rows with a friend. not once but a couple of times but my other friends were always there to watch out for me. Thanks Guys! Esp Sameen & Shaun during the CV Environmental Rally 2003. I was really depressed. Another time I nearly jumped off my friend's 10th floor balcony coz of a row with the same person. Thank God my guardian angel was 'working' over time that night. : ( Never want to live another episode like that.

Eiy, it's almost 5am. i know I've been pouring my heart out and ranting so much. Sorry if i made life a little bothersome for a while. hehehe... But life goes on. I'm ok. Pretty happy these days. i try to. A laugh a day keeps the shrink away! hahaha...